heh yo peeps !
Ya , i'm back here again . Finally have the time to blogged.
Didnt have the mood to post actually , but i'm feraking bored now as the following afternoon i take a long nap at baby house.
That's why this is the place that i remind of! (:
Today HKSS (my previous secondary) having a C.O Camp . LiMin and Christine ask me whether am i going ?
I dont think so , cause i afraid to have friendships gap in between them. Thats what i experience before since past few years , every should be the same or may be worser i doubt.
I miss them of course , but i dont want to disgrace myself . i know the camp will be fun , but i just have the feeling , including me , it wont turns out good.
I also wish to gather together with them , but i afraid to face the truth. So i dont think they will be happy to see me.
On another hand ,
i also busy. Actually going to Eddie BBQ birthday party , but baby haa been sick since Sunday , so he is not able to attend. But we replace something meaningful today ! Guess what ? Me & Baby are going to the Library to have revision ! :D
My retake O Levels coming and yet i have studied NOTHING!
Omg , now is time to burn midnight oil , HAHA . That's how my way of studying ._.
Okays , seems to be ridiculous , but is true , if i studied early , my result dont turns out good unless i have lots of revision . LOL .
This few days went to baby house to take care of him , worried him sick ! His temperature was unstable , reached as high as 39degree! Although i'm sick, i still make effort to go his house as i really worried. But i dont know how he think of me . hais. We have been together since a year ago , yet he cant totally trust me . I just dont know why he thinks that way , he kept thought that i will remind of the past. I have explain till my saliva dried up ! I really love him , but he just dont understand . Everyday suspecting me and also not having confidence in himself. I wish he could be mature one day, will be strong and stable enough to take care of me till the end. I dont wish he to be in this way. What is love? I also wish to ask him. I've been sacrifising lots of things to have our love, yet this is the way i get ? I dont think this is the thing i should deserve , but eventually everything ends up this way. I WANT HIM CHANGE! but up till now , still no valid. I need his shoulder , i need his care , not his suspicion . I knew nothing is perfect , i dont expect you to be perfect. i just need you to be a more acceptable.
Do you know i'm lonely?
I'm been enduring , but you always turn to me and mention you know , everything needs time. What i can do is giving a fake smile and let it bygones. I really wish you could think more on my feelings. I'm your gf , i've been concerning you all the time , but at the same time , no one is concerning me , cosidering my feelings. Do you know what's the meaning of Lonely? Thats what i ami n a situation . Look through phone contacts , seems to be full. But no one to turn to . So many friends for what fuck? Thats why i need the closest person is you , Baby!
Maybe you not as mature, thats why you dont understand . I only needs a listening ear , just as simple. i hate you to suspect me! Suspicion is the biggest problem between couples , no trust then will have this! i dont know why you from the start seems to lost trust in me. I also need some privacy.
Fuck , i type so many , blogger seems to have problem and delete half of my post, Nabei Cheebye! No mood to post anymore , wasting my time. Bye peeps. Sorry for all vulgarites ~
PS : Great Singapore Sales ! View my Blogshop. (:
